It's time for some more demonic shenanigans from The Exorcist universe. This time, I'm reviewing Exorcist II: The Heretic (1977). Warning: SPOILERS.
Father Merrin's legacy is in danger due to his more controversial opinions and the Church's suspicions that he died possessed make it worse. This is why Father Lamont, who worked with Merrin, and has just failed an exorcism, is sent to the US to find out what really happened years ago in Washington DC. Meanwhile, Regan is doing fine, or at least that's what she tells her therapist, Dr Gene Tuskin. However, after witnessing a synchronized hypnosis session between the two, Father Lamont realizes that Pazuzu still has a hold on Regan and he must finish what Merrin started.
The beginning isn’t very promising, as the audience is treated to a failed exorcism by Father Lamont that involves the victim, a healer, self-immolating with a dozen or so candles. Unless you can afford good fake fire, please refrain from setting people on fire. Even less promising is Regan’s reappearance due to the fact that Linda Blair’s acting hasn’t improved in the 4 years between movies. Really, it’s bad. Even worse is the movie’s decision to undo the ending of its predecessor by having Father Lamont realize that Merrin’s exorcism wasn’t successful and that Regan’s demonic squatter still has a hold on her. This is bad for several reasons. First, it messes with a 4-year story that had given absolutely no indication that something might still be wrong; there were no suspicious looks from Regan or ominous camera work. Second, anyone who’s seen The Exorcist already knows that Merrin’s exorcism attempt didn’t work - Pazuzu left Regan because Karras offered himself in her place, after which he jumped off the window and went splat on the stairs behind the house. It would’ve been very easy for The Heretic to have Lamont say that Pazuzu managed to return to Regan after Karras died, but the movie just completely ignores his role in the exorcism. Thirdly, we learn all this through a synchronized hypnosis session, in which Tuskin uses a device to sort of mind meld with Regan so she can join her in her trance to uncover more of her memories of her time in Washington DC. Yes, this is a movie about demonic possession, but the fact that Tuskin pretty much invented a mind reading machine that allows her and Lamont to see a possessed Regan taunt Merrin before killing him with a heart attack is just too hard to believe. And last but not the least, that scene looked bad. Regan sounded too much like her human self and not a demon and the juxtaposition between the confrontation in the past and the synchronized hypnosis in the present robbed it of any spookiness. Not long after this, Lamont realizes Regan can predict the future when she draws flames and he and Tuskin end up putting out a fire in the building’s basement. I thought we were going to find out that Regan herself had started the fire, but even after he said that Pazuzu still had power over her, Lamont is convinced that she has a gift and saved everyone. Hmm, why? That makes absolutely no sense, but unfortunately he’s right, and Regan won’t be doing any evil this time. What she will be doing is having dreams about Merrin’s first meeting with Pazuzu and more synchronized hypnosis sessions, which Pazuzu uses to reach out to Lamont.
Regan isn’t the only one from The Exorcist who’s back - Sharon is, too. Chris MacNeil’s assistant is staying with Regan while her mother is away, but even after everything she experienced in the previous movie, she doesn’t notice Regan is having Pazuzu dreams and sleepwalking on the roof. That’s also the day she leaves her alone so she can go back to Washington DC and show Lamont the old house. Sharon tells him that while she stayed away for 2 years because she feared Regan, she also feels at peace near her. Given her fate, the movie really should’ve spent more time with the character, shown more of her inner turmoil, or hinted at her being untrustworthy before the end in a way that can't be mistaken for sheer incompetence. Nothing happens during this visit to the house, save that a really weird bug watches as Lamont prays in the room where it all happened. After Lamont returns for another synchronized hypnosis session, Tuskin mentions she’s divorced and asks him if he ever needs a woman, which is such a bizarre, inappropriate question that I thought she was going to be revealed to be possessed by Pazuzu. Who the hell asks someone that? Anyway, this new session reveals some useful information because for some reason, Pazuzu decided to show Regan Kokumo, a young man he possessed and Merrin saved, and now she shares the vision with Lamont. Pazuzu brags that he can still reach him and invites Lamont to share his wings because the movie not only names him (a lot), but refers to him as Pazuzu, the King of the Evil Spirits of the Air. That’s a pretty impressive title which translates into a big weird bug who commands a bunch of angry locusts. As someone who hates bugs, this should’ve been enough to freak me out, and it’s a testament to the movie’s overall crapiness that even its bugs weren’t able to scare me. Despite his claims, Pazuzu ends up being repelled by his former victim, who throws a leopard at him. So, Pazuzu had no idea Kokumo could do that? That makes no sense. Also, you’ll notice how this first meeting between Merrin and Pazuzu doesn’t match what happened in Exorcist: The Beginning, which I believe constitutes some well-deserved karmic payback for The Heretic pretending Karras didn’t exist. This dream/trance sequence gives the audience the only good thing about this movie - the Rock Churches of Ethiopia. They’re not spooky, but they look impressive, and I was surprised to learn that they’re real. Maybe because they are real, the movie didn't do much with them, not when Merrin was there, not when Lamont travels to Ethiopia to find Kokumo and learn how he’s able to fight Pazuzu. And no, there’s never any explanation for why an ancient Mesopotamian demon is hanging out in an African country. I could be mean and wonder if the people behind this franchise know these are in 2 different continents, but I’ve decided to give them the benefit of the doubt. But before Lamont goes to search for Kokumo, Regan makes an autistic girl talk with her non demonic healing abilities. Even though Pazuzu also has some health-related powers, Lamont doesn’t connect the two. Which is fine, because neither does the movie; instead, we get a conversation about world telepathy and whether the world is ready for it. Judging by what goes on on social media, I believe the answer is hell no and it never will.
After he travels to Ethiopia, Lamont is welcomed at the same Rock Church where Merrin performed the exorcism. They even share their bread Jesus with him. But then he mentions flying with Pazuzu and everyone becomes convinced he’s a devil worshipper and starts stoning him. This sequence is interspersed with Regan doing a tap dance routine at a school recital. She feels the stones, starts dodging them, and ends up falling off stage. This looked embarrassing and is one of many, many moments in which I couldn’t help laughing. Unfortunately, the movie clearly didn’t mean for this or any of the other sequences to be funny. While Regan is taken to the hospital and sedated, Lamont keeps looking for Kokumo and finally finds him in a mud village called Jepti. To do so, he must ask Pazuzu for help. The demon is still working through Regan, which is just weird. If he’s the King of the Evil Spirits of the Air, why is he so limited? What follows is even weirder. First, Lamont sees Kokumo as a shaman wearing a locust headdress, who asks him to walk over pikes half submerged in shallow water to prove he’s not under Pazuzu’s influence. If Lamont fails the test, he threatens to spit out a leopard, and to prove he can do it, he spits out a red fruit. Well, that's not very impressive. Lamont starts walking, we see the spikes go into his foot, and it looks like he’s going to fall on the spikes, but then he finds himself in a locust monitoring station with scientist Kokumo. This Kokumo dismisses the claim of having been possessed by Pazuzu and tells Lamont how locusts go mad when they brush wings; he created a new locust, who is not only immune to that, but will help bring forth a new immune breed of locusts. So, was this a vision, or was shaman Kokumo a culturally questionable fantasy thought up by a desperate Lamont? Not only does the movie never bother to clarify that, but it will also lean heavily on the locust metaphor.
Long story short, Regan steals the synchronizer and she and Lamont, who’s just returned from his trip, use it again. This time Merrin tells Lamont to carry on his work finding these Good people and protect them from Pazuzu, starting with Regan. Lamont ends up in a trance and walks out of there while Regan runs after him. His destination? The Washington DC house. Two questions that will never be answered: why would Lamont take off without Regan? And why would a Mesopotamian demon who hangs around Ethiopia need that particular house? Tuskin and Sharon go after them but keep getting derailed by people in need of medical care. Merrin’s request turns out to be a ruse by Pazuzu to get Regan at that very special house and seduce Lamont into killing her. You know, I’m starting to suspect Pazuzu has a thing for Catholic priests going through a crisis of faith and all these possessions are just a way to make out with them. Oh, and did I mention he’ll be doing this seducing while looking like Regan? The combination of a laughably non scary demonic voice and Linda Blair's attempts at portraying a seductive evil demon don't help. The awfulness keeps piling up as the locust metaphor makes its return and we get a scene of Lamont attempting to kill Regan while she begs him to stop and he yells ‘The wings are brushing me, I must, I must’. I nearly died from secondhand embarrassment watching. How the hell did no one involved in this see just how ridiculous the whole thing looked? How?
Pazuzu’s hold on Lamont is broken when Regan repeats Kokumo’s words about the locusts and the desperate question ('Por qué?') of the healer from the beginning. He realizes Regan is the Good Locust who will end Pazuzu’s reign of terror. So, he attacks Pazuzu Regan instead and as the house falls apart around them, rips out her heart. This doesn’t stop Regan from being surrounded by a swarm of locusts. But as she touches them, they fall to the ground, suddenly calm and peaceful. Wait, wasn’t the whole locust thing just a metaphor? Why make it literal? This whole sequence was ridiculous enough already.
Meanwhile, as Lamont and Regan face Pazuzu, Tuskin and Sharon arrive in a taxi that crashes through the gate. Turns out Sharon was, I don’t know, affected by Pazuzu and chose Evil, so this means she’s going to set herself on fire using the taxi’s leaked fuel and broken headlight in front of Tuskin. This was just random and I still don't get it. If she was helping Pazuzu get to Regan somehow, the movie didn’t really show it. It’s like The Heretic suddenly realized none of the named characters had died. Regan and Lamont get to them in time for him to perform last rites on a dying Sharon. Then, the two leave to carry on Merrin’s work. Except she now knows he has the hots for her, which is really awkward. By the way, I had no idea how old Regan was here, but after googling it, I found out she was only 16 which adds a really big layer of ick to Lamont giving in, even if he was being affected by Pazuzu.
VERDICT
Exorcist: The Heretic made me feel like I owed Exorcist: The Beginning an apology. The only good thing I can say about it is that there was no wall crawling. The weirdest part is that the story of a priest being sent to look deeper into Merrin’s work and getting tricked by Pazuzu isn’t bad, and some of the interactions between Lamont and the demon were good on paper. Unfortunately, the movie completely wasted all of it and buried it under several layers of bad acting and terrible dialogue. On top of that, poor Pazuzu got robbed of what was left of his dignity. If you want a good follow up on Regan, Chris, and Pazuzu, go watch the first season of The Exorcist (2016).
By Danforth