The Exorcism of God (2021)

I’d hoped to do Testament of Adam first, but then I watched The Exorcism of God (2021) and just had to review it. Warning: SPOILERS.

Nearly 2 decades after being temporarily possessed by a demon during an exorcism, Father Peter finds out that the demon is back and this time things are going to be even more difficult. Balban has plans for him, and doesn’t give up easily…

The movie opens with Father Peter deciding not to wait for the more experienced exorcist, Father Michael, and deal with the demon himself. You can tell that The Exorcism of God has lofty goals because there’s a shot of Peter standing outside the house that looks just like Father Merrin’s arrival in The Exorcist. That’s not something a movie dealing with demonic possession should ever, ever do. The victim here is Magali, who, we’ll learn much later, is a nun and works at the church orphanage with Peter. She has that gross look all possession victims get, but that doesn’t stop the demon from trying to seduce the priest, who does have feelings for her. Shockingly, it works for about 5 seconds, but it’s clear that, despite Magali looking beyond awful, not being in control of her body, and likely being in pain, it’s very difficult for Peter not to stare at her boobs, which the demon keeps showing him. At one point, the demon masturbates and the weird, squishy sound effects made me wonder WTF was going on down there. And yet, right after the demon appears to leave Magali’s body and she looks normal again, Peter doesn’t hesitate to engage in a makeout session. After seeing that? Eww! Naturally the demon hasn’t left yet, and takes this chance to possess Peter. The audience doesn’t see what follows, or how Peter snapped out of it, but since there’s an 18-year time jump, it’s pretty obvious what happened.

Father Peter is still in the same small Mexican town, saying mass, running the orphanage with the nuns, and distributing free food among the people. Everyone thinks he’s practically a living saint for exorcizing Magali, but of course Peter knows better and still feels guilty; not guilty enough to do what he should’ve done and confess to the Bishop, though. And of course, when he thinks of doing it, his sense of duty towards the orphans and the village is stronger and he keeps his mouth shut. However, hiding his sin becomes impossible when he’s called to a nearby prison to deal with an inmate who turns out to be his and Magali’s daughter Esperanza. She’s possessed by the same demon, Balban, a Prince of Hell specializing in deceit and deals you really shouldn’t accept, and killed a man in a horrible way we don’t get to see. I was surprised to find out that Magali was still alive, but she is and she hasn’t forgiven Peter for what he did. To add to all this mess, he starts to have nightmares with a possessed Jesus that frankly looks more funny than scary. That the first time he shows up he tries to bite Peter’s neck didn’t help, neither does the fact that he looks a lot like a zombie. I get that it was supposed to be the statue from the cross coming to life and not a person, but it still looked silly. But it’s not just Jesus - his mother also starts walking around, freaking people out! Her target is a young nun, Camile, who gets to find a maggot-riddled baby Jesus before being attacked by possessed Mary, who has the power to make the children sick. This means Balban is responsible for the strange illness that has been killing the children of the village, which makes him extremely powerful and a lot more ambitious than other movie demons (sorry Pazuzu and Asmodeus, but you lose points for staying in bed). Possessed Mary looks worse than her son, and that’s really annoying as the concept is creepy and this should’ve been a lot scarier.

Filled with self-doubt, Peter asks for Father Michael’s help, which leads to a lot of reminders of how Peter must be free of sin in order to face the demon while Peter looks guilty as hell. This doesn’t stop him from burning the video of the exorcism, though; and at about this time, the movie gives the audience a completely unnecessary flashback to a possessed Peter raping a barely conscious Magali, overcoming Balban afterwards, and then being praised as a saint by Magali’s grateful mother. Thankfully the camera panned away while that first bit was happening, but there was no need for that. Peter and Michael’s first meeting with Esperanza ends with her biting Michael’s ear off, and letting them believe that she can be sedated like any non possessed person. I don’t get how no one thought that was odd, or how Michael could walk around with a bandage on his now missing ear like nothing happened. Maybe his mescal flask helped. Anyway, the 2 gullible idiots plus the prison director Uribe and Nelson, the doctor, decide to sedate all the other 13 inmates so Balban can’t influence them, and have most people leave so Peter and Michael can exorcize Esperanza in peace and quiet. They wanted everyone gone, but Uribe refused because he’s clearly a moron, which means that Balban has a lot more minions to do his bidding. While getting things ready for the exorcism, Father Michael complains about the Church’s unwillingness to improve the ritual, and even says that he sometimes wonder if the Devil infiltrated the Vatican. That seems a little paranoid. Surely someone would notice if there were several possessed members of the clergy walking around sabotaging the work of God. Michael’s advice to Peter? He should believe he is God. Well, that’s new. He also tells him to never ever make a deal with Balban because the demon will always trick him. Hmm, isn’t that what demons usually do? There’s still time for a conversation between Peter and Magali before the exorcism starts, and she’s a lot nicer to him. At first, I was annoyed when she said she was glad it had happened because she got Esperanza, but that’s a really complicated situation and her keeping the baby makes it even more complicated.

And now, it’s time to send that dastardly demon Balban back to Hell. Peter and Michael are shocked, SHOCKED to find out that Esperanza isn’t in her cell. Idiots. Nelson realizes the plan didn’t work like they expected when he finds all the cell doors open and a dead guard, but can’t tell anyone because he’s attacked by one of the other inmates. Balban’s meat puppets are pretty violent, so it’s not good that Peter’s secret is preventing him from accessing his inner God. Luckily, Michael can keep the possessed inmates at bay with his cross, but unfortunately, he can’t do anything to Balban because it turns out that he made a deal with the demon to end a possession. This means the fate of everyone is in the hands of Father Peter, and after Michael dies, he decides to finally confess what he did to the Church and sends a video to Monsignor Balduci. Filled with the power of God, he manages to fight back against the inmates and Possessed Jesus, who decided to attempt some spooky wall crawling. Needless to say, it looked ridiculous. Please, please, stop with the wall crawling. Peter’s triumph is short lived because apparently God is vulnerable to getting conked on the head. He wakes up tied to a chair and Balban reveals part of his plan: he’s going to exorcize Peter and force God out of him. That was an interesting twist. To make matters worse, Possessed Mary shows up at the hospital to mess with Camile again and kill all the children with her creepy pointing. The exorcism starts well - a reversion of the usual litany with Hell and the Devil replacing Heaven and God - but it begins to look ridiculous after a while. In some shots, the way Esperanza and the possessed inmates behind her were framed, I almost expected them to break into song. Long story short, a desperate Peter agrees to let God leave his body in exchange for the children and Esperanza’s lives. Of course, Balban has a greater, secret plan, and Peter played right into it.

After the children were miraculously healed, Peter is seen by all as a hero, almost a living saint, and we get to see part of a mass where he enumerates all the bad people who won’t make it to Heaven to his congregation. This includes gays, which is probably Biblically accurate but not very nice and doesn’t sound like something kind Father Peter would say. Balduci shows up to tell him that he deleted the video and that there’s a place as adviser in the Vatican waiting for him. Aw, that’s nice… Except Father Peter is possessed by Balban and guess what? Balduci knows because Father Michael wasn’t being paranoid when he mentioned a possible demonic infiltration in the Vatican! However, it turns out God had a plan B and chose Esperanza to take the place of her now possessed father. Still, the movie ends with Peter at the Vatican and a voiceover in which he explains that the evil ones won’t go to Heaven but they’ll inherit the earth. Sadly there doesn’t appear to be a sequel, so we won’t get to see a Possessed Peter VS Esperanza in a Holy See overrun by Satan’s minions.

VERDICT

The Exorcism of God has some ridiculous moments and uneven acting, but it manages to subvert the expectations created by that homage to The Exorcist and avoids the tired swearing kid in bed scenario. Balban is a good demon, and I have to give the movie points for doing what the trailer for The Pope’s Exorcist seemed to promise. Now I’d really like a movie that starts where this one ended and actually shows the demonic infiltration in the Vatican.

By Danforth